What happens on LLNOE, stays on LLNOE...

[SharkUSMC]

We want LLNOE to be a safe place where people can feel open about discussing sensitive issues like finances. By taking part in this community, we have all put our trust in you that you would treat all of us the way you want to be treated. Trust is a fragile thing, and when its boundaries are stretched, it takes quite a while for that trust to be restored. When you take information you see here, and use it to belittle someone, or attack someone by posting on this site or another, you have breached that trust, and shown your lack of character and integrity. If you have no character and no integrity, this is probably not the place for you. Your time might be better spent finding ways to improve yourself, more so than worrying about what others are doing.

[JenB]

I missed this, somehow, when I checked the board (20 times previously) this morning.

:gpost:

[GAPeach]

Absolutely something that needed addressed. I've posted very little specific information since I've started seeing LLNOE become fodder for posts on other boards and blogs.

[oh2Bdebtfree]

Absolutely something that needed addressed. I've posted very little specific information since I've started seeing LLNOE become fodder for posts on other boards and blogs.

Yeah, I've been thinking of trying to see if I can delete my posts that have specific info in them in case someone I know IRL stumbles upon them.

[christy5022]

Maybe I'm odd man out... but I don't post anything that I don't care who sees.
But I do have a question... How are people finding out who is posting things on other sites? Especially if they use a different name?
This actually bothers me more than if someone posted about something I said. To me if I said it and it's true..I'm either willing to back it up or I don't care what other people think.... but it bothers me that people are hunting me down on other sites to see what I am saying. To me that feels like an intrusion, unlike if I post on this site for everyone to see. I posted on another site under a different name for a reason....

By the way..I'm not trying to start an argument or anything, And I do NOT post about other people on other sites..... but am really curious as to why people spend time figuring our who is who between sites...

[dp9080]

I kind of feel like people come here for advise and encouragement and expect that it is shared with people who are "wierd" like they are or hope to be...I think many are here because they are not comfortable discussing some topics with those they know IRL - there is safety here. When it does not feel safe, many people will not be honest when they post. Just my feelings though...

[proulxfamily]

By the way..I'm not trying to start an argument or anything, And I do NOT post about other people on other sites..... but am really curious as to why people spend time figuring our who is who between sites...
Just as an example, I post a good amount both here and the original board where I started TMMO on almost 2.5 years ago. If I were to see someone who did NOT know that I post at both places (I have different usernames) mock or make nasty comments about me, I would be furious. If I saw something like that written by another member here, it would be purely coincidental since I just happen to belong to two boards. I know of one person who posts in both besides me but I don't know who they are, in either place.

But a good example of why I think administration is right about keeping what stays on LLNOE on LLNOE shows in a thread from this past week, about several very respected members of LLNOE. That's completely out of line, especially since this is supposed to be a place to support those on their journey to financial freedom... not a place to glean material for jokes and mockery elsewhere.

[christy5022]

Just as an example, I post a good amount both here and the original board where I started TMMO on almost 2.5 years ago. If I were to see someone who did NOT know that I post at both places (I have different usernames) mock or make nasty comments about me, I would be furious. If I saw something like that written by another member here, it would be purely coincidental since I just happen to belong to two boards. I know of one person who posts in both besides me but I don't know who they are, in either place.

But a good example of why I think administration is right about keeping what stays on LLNOE on LLNOE shows in a thread from this past week, about several very respected members of LLNOE. That's completely out of line, especially since this is supposed to be a place to support those on their journey to financial freedom... not a place to glean material for jokes and mockery elsewhere.


I never said that administration wasn't right. I have always realized that what I post on ANY board is PUBLIC...and there will ALWAY be people in real life, and on boards who don't know how to be considerate.

What I am asking is HOW people figure out What other people are posting on other boards..and who they are? In another thread there were people saying WHO someone was on another board... I am asking HOW someone figures that out. To me this is bothersome....that people are hunting down (don't know how to say that any other way.) who is who at each board UNLESS they have said.

[proulxfamily]

In another thread there were people saying WHO someone was on another board... I am asking HOW someone figures that out. To me this is bothersome....that people are hunting down (don't know how to say that any other way.) who is who at each board UNLESS they have said.
That's what I was trying to point out... I belong to two boards. If someone posted information from one board to the other, I would see it and know. There's no hunting involved.

[christy5022]

That's what I was trying to point out... I belong to two boards. If someone posted information from one board to the other, I would see it and know. There's no hunting involved.

Well if they have the same user name.
But what about if they don't have the same user name? And this is what I am talking about..

[proulxfamily]

Well if they have the same user name.
But what about if they don't have the same user name? And this is what I am talking about..
No idea... someone else will have to speak up. The poster who spoke badly against members here has linked their blog before... which is also linked to the forum in which it was posted. A lot of people here have blogs... though the ones I read at usually aren't by very active members.

[SharkUSMC]

Often times posters to other sites will directly reference llnoe.com in their posts.

Myself, I don't bother looking around other boards, I'm busy enough here. But I am occasionally notified that people are posting elsewhere and referencing people here, or this board in general. Most often this is seen by someone that has accounts both here and elsewhere.

I merely wanted to appeal to the character of individuals doing so, in the hopes that they would have enough class to be self-policing. I have no desire to censure their activities elsewhere or really even here for that matter. If they really want to go somewhere else and belittle people, there's not much I can do about it. However, I felt it behooves me to point out the utter lack of respect for others as well as lack of self-respect it takes to engage in such activities.

There seemed to be some especially disturbing posts elsewhere that many had mentioned to me recently, as well as some people posting here that seem to be missing the point of a community of helping others, rather than feeling the need to speak out in judgement of one another. I felt in my role as the Site Manager, I should at least address the concerns of the individuals being maligned. In the end, I can only appeal to character. And if that is lacking, then I am left without appeal.

If you desire further discourse on the matter christy5022, please feel free to PM me.

-Shark

[christy5022]

No idea... someone else will have to speak up. The poster who spoke badly against members here has linked their blog before... which is also linked to the forum in which it was posted. A lot of people here have blogs... though the ones I read at usually aren't by very active members.


ahhh...Ok.. see that is what I wasn't understanding. That makes more since. I don't blog and don't normally read blogs ...so I never thought about that. That would make it easy to figure out who is who. Not quite what my pea brain was thinking :crazy2:...lol..

[CrunchyTXMama]

Just so I understand, are you wanting us to not mention LLNOE anywhere else? I've mentioned it several times on a couple of other boards, but only to steer people here who are interested in Dave's principles.

[DeannP]

Just so I understand, are you wanting us to not mention LLNOE anywhere else? I've mentioned it several times on a couple of other boards, but only to steer people here who are interested in Dave's principles.

No, I don't believe that's what is meant at all. The problem is that there are people that come HERE in order to get blog fodder to belittle people in other places (blogs or other boards). Shark is pointing out that it is disrespectful and shows a lack of integrity and character.

People come here and sometimes say things they don't tell people IRL because they expect that people here will understand, they don't expect to have someone use it as entertainment on their blog to make fun of them.

[kelmickra]

Just so I understand, are you wanting us to not mention LLNOE anywhere else? I've mentioned it several times on a couple of other boards, but only to steer people here who are interested in Dave's principles.
We at LLNOE love it when people invite others here. Please continue to do so.

No, I don't believe that's what is meant at all. The problem is that there are people that come HERE in order to get blog fodder to belittle people in other places (blogs or other boards). Shark is pointing out that it is disrespectful and shows a lack of integrity and character.

People come here and sometimes say things they don't tell people IRL because they expect that people here will understand, they don't expect to have someone use it as entertainment on their blog to make fun of them.
This is exactly what he meant. Some people have found that others are making snide remarks about people here on this board, stalking others to their blogs or other forums, and just make an ugly pest of themselves. Its called cyber-harassment or cyberstalking or cyberbullying (http://www.officer.com/article/article.jsp?id=30373&siteSection=18). If you find that someone is doing so, belittling others for the sake of looking good, then you know what type of character they truly have. This act not only makes people worried that their information is being misconstrued or spread all over the cyber world, but breaks the fabric of trust they have put here by placing their information on this forum. We cannot police the whole world wide web and we know this. Yet we want to try to instill that whatever is written here is private and to please keep what is said on LLNOE to stay on LLNOE.

[GAPeach]

Maybe I'm odd man out... but I don't post anything that I don't care who sees.
But I do have a question... How are people finding out who is posting things on other sites? Especially if they use a different name?
This actually bothers me more than if someone posted about something I said. To me if I said it and it's true..I'm either willing to back it up or I don't care what other people think.... but it bothers me that people are hunting me down on other sites to see what I am saying. To me that feels like an intrusion, unlike if I post on this site for everyone to see. I posted on another site under a different name for a reason....

By the way..I'm not trying to start an argument or anything, And I do NOT post about other people on other sites..... but am really curious as to why people spend time figuring our who is who between sites...

Many of the people are bold enough to use the same name and SPECIFICALLY use peoples user names here when discussing LLNOE. Or else they will have the same link to the blog. Trust me we have better things to do than sit and play detective. :cop2: LOL!

[YBNRML]

Not sure what I missed (as I presume that a thread went out of hand, ended up elsewhere, etc.), but this is the reason that I changed my username here.

LLNOE staff - keep up the good work! Intervene when needed and let the good times roll...

:2cents:

[MomToOne]

I missed what is going on, but that's okay. I like being in the dark about things like this.

I think it's sad that someone here would do that. It makes you wonder, are they really here for the same reason we are? Or was it just to garner blog fodder?

[cjohnston4]

I missed what is going on, but that's okay. I like being in the dark about things like this.

I think it's sad that someone here would do that. It makes you wonder, are they really here for the same reason we are? Or was it just to garner blog fodder?

I think virtually all the people who post to this forum are here for similar reasons. There are folks however who have different perspectives.

I've seen where different people have taken the same post and saw it as humorous, cutesy and annoying.

I've seen people who follow Dave's plan losely and do well be chastized by those who claim to follow it almost to the letter and struggle. And vice versa.

I recently saw a thread openned asking for info only to be closed later by the OP who was upset they received "info" beyond what they expected. Frankly I saw it as insightful information. They took it apparently as being attacked. Two people reading the same posts who had two different perspectives on what was the give and take. I write a blog of things that interest me and I actually had considered writing something about that thread. Not the details or names or even a link, but the differences in how people seeing the same OP and replies saw something different. Maybe someone seeing my blog had I followed through with my initial inclination to write about it would have put two and two together and figured I was breaking that trust when in fact I would have been only talking about how humans can perceive the same information differently.

What people really need to remember is even in a so called "safe zone" if you have something out their on the web you really don't want known by others, you simply shouldn't put it out there.

A great example is until about 30 days ago, people putting personal information and questions on Dave's forum could have those posts googled. People were speaking freely about family (some threads openly talked of divorcing a spouse and the spouse had no idea it was coming and it was designed to catch them by surprise), church members and the like were all out there despite the forum was supposed to only be open to members. All someone had to do was google a members name and the posts came flowing. It has since been fixed, but it caused quite a scare for a day or so.

[Roy Randolph]

A great example is until about 30 days ago, people putting personal information and questions on Dave's forum could have those posts googled. People were speaking freely about family (some threads openly talked of divorcing a spouse and the spouse had no idea it was coming and it was designed to catch them by surprise), church members and the like were all out there despite the forum was supposed to only be open to members. All someone had to do was google a members name and the posts came flowing. It has since been fixed, but it caused quite a scare for a day or so.
This is the very reason that all forums here at LLNOE (EXCEPT the forums in the Welcome to LLNOE section) are not searchable by the search engine spiders.

[tedearly]

Howdy,
Scholarship Experts - Free Service - LLNOE Sponsor - Living Like No One ... (http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0oGkiYpG.hHz80Ae0FXNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTE0YzlxMDF xBHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDNgRjb2xvA3NrMQR2dGlkA1BSMDIyXzEyN g--/SIG=12ldri8ov/EXP=1206480041/**http%3a//www.livinglikenooneelse.com/forum/showthread.php%3ft=14466)


Scholarship Experts - Free Service - LLNOE Sponsor LLNOE Sponsors ... Find all posts by tedearly. July 10th, 2007, 12:23 AM. lnelson. Determined to do it! ...
www.livinglikenooneelse.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14466 - 42k

I found this when I searched tedearly posts on yahoo. This creeps me out. So it wasn't just the welcome post.
Karen

[JenB]

Howdy,
Scholarship Experts - Free Service - LLNOE Sponsor - Living Like No One ... (http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0oGkiYpG.hHz80Ae0FXNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTE0YzlxMDF xBHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDNgRjb2xvA3NrMQR2dGlkA1BSMDIyXzEyN g--/SIG=12ldri8ov/EXP=1206480041/**http%3a//www.livinglikenooneelse.com/forum/showthread.php%3ft=14466)


Scholarship Experts - Free Service - LLNOE Sponsor LLNOE Sponsors ... Find all posts by tedearly. July 10th, 2007, 12:23 AM. lnelson. Determined to do it! ...
www.livinglikenooneelse.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14466 - 42k

I found this when I searched tedearly posts on yahoo. This creeps me out. So it wasn't just the welcome post.
Karen

Karen,

The LLNOE sponsor area is visible to anyone.. You don't have to be logged in to see that forum. I just logged out and was able to get there.

If you log out and then come to LLNOE, you can then see what threads are viewable to non-members

[Roy Randolph]

Howdy,
Scholarship Experts - Free Service - LLNOE Sponsor - Living Like No One ... (http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0oGkiYpG.hHz80Ae0FXNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTE0YzlxMDF xBHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDNgRjb2xvA3NrMQR2dGlkA1BSMDIyXzEyN g--/SIG=12ldri8ov/EXP=1206480041/**http%3a//www.livinglikenooneelse.com/forum/showthread.php%3ft=14466)


Scholarship Experts - Free Service - LLNOE Sponsor LLNOE Sponsors ... Find all posts by tedearly. July 10th, 2007, 12:23 AM. lnelson. Determined to do it! ...
www.livinglikenooneelse.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14466 - 42k

I found this when I searched tedearly posts on yahoo. This creeps me out. So it wasn't just the welcome post.
Karen

That would be correct.

If you go to the forums home page, here http://www.livinglikenooneelse.com/forum/index.php
You will see that these forums are located in to "Welcome to LLNOE" Section of the site.

Info Regarding LLNOE

LLNOE Sponsors (that is the link you found on Yahoo)

New Member Introduction (this needs to be moved into the Members Area of the site)

In Memory of Lloyd Derebery - Forum Co-Founder

Donate to LivingLikeNoOneElse.com

So your find would be correct, and nothing to be creeped out about.

[Roy Randolph]

New Member Introduction (this needs to be moved into the Members Area of the site)



This forum has since been moved to a private area of the site.

[tedearly]

Howdy,
So do I need to delete this message?
Karen

[kelmickra]

Howdy,
So do I need to delete this message?
Karen
A mod does the deleting. Just pm one and tell them what you wish to have deleted.

[RubySlippers]

I have a comment about deleting. I really really wish we could delete our own posts. I've posted too much personal info here and regret it. My dh would kill me if he realized it. And although I don't give my real name, I use the same user name on other sites and now I feel like I can never ever meet those people in real life for fear of them making the connection between the me on that site and the me on this site. Is that making sense?

I just wish we could delete our own posts. :(

[SharkUSMC]

Scarlett,

I'm sending you a PM to address your concerns. You should get it shortly.

[finallyonboard]

Thanks for the great security here, this is such a cozy place to come chat and spill one's guts :)

For fun I searched my screen name and see that the FPU section is also "google-able" Just to let y'all know.

Thanks again for your diligence Roy and mods!